No power on my street in Lincoln Park still. I fled to Wicker Park last night so I could power my BlackBerry and answer some emails.

I was traveling northbound on Milwaukee during rush hour in my car and I got stuck in the intersection of Milwaukee and Evergreen while trying to get past North Ave. Traffic was barely moving since all the hipsters were mulling about at the Triangle (Milwaukee-Damen-North) causing only a few cars to get though a green light.

After I got caught in the intersection, I started a left turn onto Evergreen to get out of the intersection. As I started to accelerate in first gear, a barrage of hipsters on rusty bikes came at me from the left. One dirty blonde, smelly T-shirt wearing girl was cut off as I completed my turn and gave me the finger. “Get out of the way! Get a job!” I politely yelled out the window as I sped down Evergreen and past Wicker Park.

Note to all Chads: watch out for incoming fleets of rusty bikes when travelling in Wicker Park. They seem to travel in packs of three to five and carry groceries from organic places or acoustic guitars that their fathers once owned. These items may damage your Jeep or BMW so use caution when traveling near Hipster Triangle.

Clearly, the lake effect is more prominent in Lincoln Park than in Wicker Park.  Ambient temperatures can apparently climb as high at 150 degrees during the early evening as proven by the below photograph that was taken at the intersection of Milwaukee/Damon/North (aka Hipster Triangle).

Due to the high temperatures in Wicker Park, the local indigenous population has taken to wearing light, worn T’s and small jeans to help adapt their often slight bodies to the extreme conditions. Cheap cigarettes, vintage trucker hats and iced coffee drinks from non-Starbucks locations also help keep average internal body temperatures low.

I had brunch in Wicker Park on Sunday afternoon with Andy, the Wicker Park chair. He told me about Feast, at 1616 N Damen, and that it is the Wicker Park version of Tilli’s. The layout of the establishment is like Tilli’s; it has a main inside eating area, a bar and an outside patio. The food quality matched the style and flavor of Tilli’s. Andy and I sat at a table right on Damen, which gave us a good view of all the social happenings. There was a table of alternative Trixies ordering salads and recapping what type of trouble they got into last night. Our service was a little slow but the food made up for it.

I will be keeping an eye on this establishment. It is an outpost in Wicker Park that a Chad or Trixie could find refuge in time of crisis.

Andy and I decided to venture into Wicker Park Tavern on North because we were attracted to the dollar burger advertisement. The environment was slightly intimidating, but the allure to investigate Wicker Park’s version of the Kinkade’s dollar burger and to try a new locale ushered me into the establishment.

We sat down and it didn’t look like anyone was serving. Out of the corner of my eye a Wicker Park alternative waitress, with alternative green-blue eye shadow, came and promptly ID’ed us; she made a joke about us looking young to lighten the mood. The bar was filled with a group of alternative Chads, a large table of people doing shots on a Thursday evening, and a random array of people seated at the bar.

We enjoyed the dollar burger that came on a white, square plate. It, well, tasted better than Kinkade’s. The burger had a slight char grilled taste to it that went well with my Pilsner beer. The server promptly asked if we wanted another beer when our current one was only 60% consumed; overall good service.

We finished our dinner, slowly sipped our beer while watching the Chicago Bear’s game on the plasma displays and then proceed to pay our tab. As we were walking out of the bar, I spotted a high school friend. We exchanged glances, greetings and then a shot of jager. A very enjoyable experience that might have us brining a few Chad and Trixie counter parts next week to see if The Tavern earns their stamp of approval.

Chad to Square Foot Ratio: 3.4/5
Burger Presentation: 4.5/5
Music: 3/5